The train is worming its way through the Norwegian landscape, and stops occasionally on a station where no one gets either on nor off. The sun is shining brightly outside the window, but I hardly notice. My nose is buried in my history book. My eyes are reading fast while my brain tries to remember as much as possible. By the time I get to school I’m actually a little satisfied. I’ve been like this for the past few days, and now my exam is finally here. History is one of the subjects I’m really good at, so you can imagine my shock and disappointment when the grade is much less then I had hoped for. I cried all the way to my apartment, even though the grade wasn’t bad, just not as good as I’m used to get in history. Now I’ve watched Fame for the hundredth time, after listened to Barbra Streisand for a while. I kept wondering; why is good never good enough? I’m not really bad in anything, really, (Except science) but that is never good enough. I want to be best in everything that I do. And since I do a lot of things, that can be a problem. I simply have to learn that good can something be good enough, and so should you, if you have the same problem as I do. People also like those who doesn’t care about being good, and those who accept that they can’t be best in everything. It’s not like I’m going to loose all my friends and family just because I start relaxing more. Right? Have a nice one.
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I am writing this post only to complain about the weather. I sat on the train home today, and since there were no wifi I had nothing to do but to stare out of the window. And the sight really depressed me. It’s the 3. of May, and there are still small piles of snow here and there. At this time of year, last year, the Spring was really early and almost like Summer. Now, it’s like this:
Today has been a fantastic day. I started it by forgetting my gym-bag so I had to run back to fetch it. When I had a five minutes-long hearing about languages in Norwegian before I had a free period for the rest of the day except for German-class, which was my last class today. Then, when we finally reach German-class, the teacher can’t be with us, so she sends us home.
When I finally got home, I sat down in the sofa with a cup of tea ready to cry for an hour, when I start to laugh hysterically. For 30 minutes I have been sitting on the sofa laughing until I cried for nothing except how tragically my life is at the moment. I am working my ass of only to fail in all the subjects I was really good at once. (Not failing, as an F, but worse than I expect of myself.) I have been in love with the same man for nearly two years, without any chance to get over him. My social life is a disaster, and I can’t even focus on my violin anymore! Quite tragic, but also tragically funny!
I think it is important to laugh of these situations sometimes, not just sit and cry. So I womaned myself up, made a list of improvements I can do, found some chocolate-chip-cookies, and started writing this post.
Just now I was sitting in my bed and moisturizing my legs, when I look to my right and right on this HUGE spider! I screamed really loud, and ran out of the room and into the living room. Standing and looking around for more spiders, I recall that my phone is on my bed, two feet away from that thing in my bedroom. I walked over to my bedroom-door and watched the spider for a really long time, before I ran in ninja-style and grabbed my phone. To minutes and a face wet of tears I stand outside the door of the ones living over us, and ask for help. Of course the helped me, sweet people. Now it’s gone. I flushed it down the toilet six times!
By the way, I will not post a picture of the freaking thing. I don’t take pictures of things I am afraid of. Those who do, aren’t really scared.
Now I can’t sleep because I am absolutly paranoid about spiders. I feel like there is one on every inch of my body, and every nail and dot on my wall looks like creepy spiders!
Have a good night!
I do not know if I am a complete idiot for not seeing this before, but as a long-time an faithful Harry Potter-fan, I cry!
I know I have been absent lately, and I am sorry. I have winter holiday, so the days passes by fast. I practice mostly the violin, watch The Big Bang Theory, and have Lotr- and Potc-marathons with my father.